My life is like Hookie 5...

I love Hookie 5 (now I think it's called Wackey 6, and if you talk to my friend Sean he calls it loco quatros) In Hookie 5 which, according to the box, is "an excellent game for young women and children!" Anyway, most of the time it's a fairly fast paced moving game. You can work with a partner or you can be on your own team. You're racing against others trying to reach the same goal. Sometimes the other players will lay down just what you need so you can get a step ahead, and sometimes those other players beat ya to what you needed to do. How does this relate to my life you might ask? I don't know. But what I do know is that I love trying to figure out the different ways in life to achieve my goals when another player beats me to what I needed to do. So, here's what's going on. I met Trevor in January in the temple at my mission companion's wedding and I've have had a crush on him ever since. This is fairly odd, OK not fairly odd, but extremely odd because the longevity of my crushes rarely last 15 minutes. So for me to be interested in someone since January is quit the feat. I've always liked him and he's always liked me but we vary in the degrees of "likeness." Sometimes I like him a lot more than he likes me and sometimes he likes me a lot more than I like him. This past summer our timing was on and we officially dated this summer but we broke up when I moved back up here to Logan for school. Since then we've still been super good friends and this past little while we have been on the same page in likeness, or so I thought. Long story short, I was under the impression that we were going to get back together and I was really excited about that but when I brought it up he explained that he couldn't date me because he's got a lot going on right now and he's got a lot of health problems. I was of course sad, but OK with it. He's not the normal boy in that sense. If he says he still wants to be friends, he will. I really appreciate that about him. So since then when we had our little D.T.R (define the relationship) I tried to get over him because I knew it wasn't going anywhere, but he started treating me just as he had before like when we were dating so it made the getting over him part harder. Anyway, this past week, not to be cliche but "the ball was in his court!" He didn't really attempt to contact me. The few times I talked to him it was because I initiated conversation through text messages. I guess why this is so hard for me is because I've been getting so many mixed signals from him. He has no intent on pursuing a relationship with me but he sends me sweet messages, holds my hand, bought me a 30.00 SWEATER, and as a joke he took me ring shopping. Do you blame me for being a girl and being confused on the status of our relationship? I hadn't heard from him in like 2 and 1/2 days when last night he texted me this message. " Hey how was your week? OK, so I'm just going to tell you this now. Some days I like you and others I don't so let's just plan on being friends. Sorry I know this is random to say this but hey I might as well tell you this so you can move onto other relationships that come your way. I've just been thinkin a lot about us and that's the conclusion I ended up with. But you're awesome!!!" OK, let's just pause here a moment. WHAT THE HECK!!!! I can't explain how many emotions I have felt since he told me that. I wasn't a jerk back to him, but I definitely let him know that I wasn't extremely happy about this little situation we were in. So, that's what's going on with Trevor. If we were playing Hookie 5, this would be a situation in which someone just went out and I still had all 12 cards in my pile left.